In about 1990, Kinnerton Morris Men, based in North Wales, sought a Mummers play. Plays were an important part of Welsh life, more so than in England. The traditional Mummers Play, however, has St.George, patron saint of the country that defeated Wales killing the dragon, which is the symbol of Wales. The traditional play, therefore, was deemed unpopular for Welsh audiences.
An alternative script was written about a true Welsh hero, Owain Glyndwr.
It was also written to be performed in the style of "People's Theatre", where members of the audience play the main characters. This has been performed by the Kinnerton Morris Men and Clerical Error.
Narrator explains the principle of Peoples Theatre. "Now I want you to take this very seriously! This is a part of our Welsh Heritage which reflects our commitment to the rich wealth of art and tradition in this country; so if you see the Dragon come up behind any of our characters, I want you to shout "Look out! There's a Dragon behind you!".
Narrator picks OWAIN GLYDWR. He is the peoples hero. He was responsible for reform of the Church, the establishment of Welsh Universities, and the burning down of the Ruthin Conservative Club.
Cheer Leader : The people CHEER when they hear OWAIN GLYNDWR'S name. (CHEER!).
Narrator : OWAIN GLYDWR (CHEER!) had a confident swagger. Pick SIR REGINALD GREY OF RUTHIN. The villain of this story is the Marcher Lord SIR REGINALD GREY OF RUTHIN. A dastardly scoundrel and member of the Ruthin Conservative Club.
Cheer Leader : The people BOO when they hear SIR REGINALD GREY OF RUTHIN'S name. (BOO!).
Narrator : Whenever SIR REGINALD GREY OF RUTHIN (BOO!) walked, he walked with a pronounced limp. (Let him limp). No, he walked with a pronounced limp wrist!. He always pronounced the letter "R" as the letter "W". They called him SIR WEGINALD GWEY OF WIFFIN (BOO!)
Picks LADY ELSEBETH OF RUTHIN BROWNIES. OWAIN GLYNDWR (CHEER!) was in love with the LADY ELSBETH OF RUTHIN BROWNIES.
Cheer Leader : People would shout OOH! when they heard the name of LADY ELSEBETH OF RUTHIN BROWNIES (OOH!)
Narrator : She walked with a pronounced sexy walk. Many days, both OWAIN GLYDWR (CHEER!) and LADY ELSBETH OF RUTHIN BROWNIES (OOH!) would walk out together arm in arm (SWAGGER and SEXY WALK), watched from afar by SIR WEGINALD GWEY OF WIFFIN (BOO!). They were very fond of Highland dancing. (DANCE). And riding POGO STICKS and (get ideas from the crowd).
Unfortunately SIR REGINALD GREY OF RUTHIN (BOO!) loved LADY ELSEBETH OF RUTHIN BROWNIES (OOH!) from afar. (Sir Reg letches from afar).
Now for the cultured bit. Pick two people. Audition for the Richard III hunchback scene. Get the crowd to choose. The WINNER is the STRAIGHT MAN. The LOSER is now the back of the horse. This is DOBBIN, the faithful horse of SIR REGINALD GREY OF RUTHIN (BOO!).
Cheer Leader : People (NEIGH!) when they hear DOBBIN'S name.
Narrator : One day, SIR WEGINALD GWEY OF WIFFIN said "I've Really, Really had enough of the Welsh Rotter and Retched Woman from Ruthin". (Use "W").
SIR WEGINALD GWEY OF WIFFIN (BOO!) walked (like John Wayne) to his horse DOBBIN (Neigh!), and mounted it (You do know what I mean by MOUNTED? Don't get nervous DOBBIN (Neigh!). SIR WEGINALD GWEY OF WIFFIN (BOO!) said "Right! I'll read that rascally retch his rights" (Use "W"'s) and wode to wiffin. (I've got it now!). And rode to Ruthin.
OWAIN GLYNDWR (CHEER!) and LADY ELSBETH OF RUTHIN BROWNIES (OOH!) were INTERIOR DECORATING and (get input from the crowd) when they saw SIR WEGINALD GWEY OF WIFFIN (BOO!) appwoaching. OWAIN GLYDWR (CHEER!) and LADY ELSEBETH OF RUTHIN BROWNIES (OOH!) walked out to greet SIR WEGINALD GWEY OF WIFFIN (BOO!)(swagger and sexy walk).
OWAIN GLYNDWR (CHEER!) and SIR WEGINALD GWEY OF WIFFIN (BOO!) broke into a realistic sword fight, whilst DOBBIN (NEIGH!) pranced his fancy footwork.
Unexpectedly, OWAIN GLYNDWR (CHEER) dies. (Let him die. Then repeat the line). Unexpectedly OWAIN GLYNDWR (CHEER!) dives under DOBBIN (NEIGH!), and stabs SIR WEGINALD GWEY OF WIFFIN (BOO!), who dies howwibly. (Wait for him to die).
LADY ELLESBETH OF RUTHUN BROWNIES (OOH!) stops her Aerobics and walks sexily to OWAIN GLYNDWR (CHEER!).
Passionately he kissed her. (Wait for kiss). Hold on, Passionately he kissed her hand.
Now for the rude bit. All the classics have rude bits, and this classic is no exception. (Editor's note : I really cannot include the next bit. You'll have to invent you own rude bit. Our original rude bit included a rubber chicken. Audiences were genuinely shocked, if not a little upset)
Well OWAIN GLYNDWR (CHEER!) faded away, and SIR WEGINALD GWEY OF WIFFIN (BOO!) was never able to say "RONALD REAGAN, REPUBLICAN". Ruthin still has its Brownies and a new Conservative Club. But the area excels in the quality of its actors. So please line up for a bow.
Thankyou for being a totally weird audience.